I was introduced, however, to a girl named Morgana, who lives in Bracciano, by my host mom, Mara. I was telling Mara about what I was trying to do with my study, and she was racking her brain trying to think of someone. Then she mentioned that she knew a girl named, Morgana. We were in the car when she was telling me this, and who would you guess we see walking just a few minutes later? Morgana! So she pulled over, I got out of the car, and she started to drive away. I realized it was only to park, but that still left me alone with a girl, and who seemed like her boyfriend, that I didn't know. They both spoke a little bit of English, and with my Italian we were able to introduce ourselves. She was really nice, and so was her boyfriend. She told me to get her number from my host brother and give her a call so that we could do something. Thank goodness! I really need to call her, not only for my study, but just for my sanity--I need a friend, one that I can go chat with for 30 minutes when I need a break, ya know?
I guess that is my biggest challenge so far here, just feeling alone. Not that I am always alone--which I guess I am at this point. I've realized though that, at least for me, it is easier to be alone, than to feel alone when you are with a big group of people. The language barrier is really getting to me. I can get my point across in some situations, but not all. And even though there are people here that speak English, I really want to be able to communicate with the people who don't and understand them. Basically none of the girls here speak English, so if I want to be friends with them, I need to really work on my Italian. There's a couple things that are really hard about it, 1) That I went from being one of the smartest people in all of my classes, to feeling like one of the least intelligent people here, just because I can't articulate or express what I want to. 2) Because I don't feel like I have a voice here, I guess it's kind of like what I've heard from other people, you kind of lose your personality a bit here with the language barriers. It was really embarrassing for me when my host mom, Mara, started explaining to everyone at church, what I was doing here--that I was in Italy to study people. Everyone kind of seemed put off by it--that it was weird. I wanted so badly to just express myself, because mainly, right now, I just want to make friends. It's hard now, my host Mom thinks that I am really quiet, mainly because I don't know how to express myself-especially to here (she speaks so quickly) , so I guess I just don't. That's definitely something I need to work on. Mistakes are the best teachers, that's what I hear! If only it was as easy to do.
.jpg) |
| YSA Group Last Saturday |
Hey! I understand how you are feeling. Not knowing the language of a people well often makes you feel isolated or stuck in your head, but I know you'll come through it. You may need to re-create your personality with what you have and maybe in doing so will make some new discoveries about yourself which is really cool. Good luck finding people and friends - we're all out here having a similar thrown into the world experience so at least in that way know you are very not alone. Good luck and good job with all you have accomplished so far.
ReplyDeleteHey! I just sent you an email! Here is also a post that Roseanna wrote. Maybe it will help? http://ecuadorfieldstudy.blogspot.com/2012/05/quick-notes-from-field.html
ReplyDeleteKierea, you are so brave! I love what Britney said about making new discoveries about yourself as you are in a new language and culture context. She says it a lot better, so I guess I'm just giving it a thumbs up. I'm proud of you! Love, Heather (the South Africa facilitator).
ReplyDeleteHey Kierea,
ReplyDeleteI also was pretty worried about the language barrier before going to Mexico. Everyone else in my group was (well, is) either Mexican, or served a mission speaking Spanish so I felt behind. Here are a few things that have helped me a lot.
Read in the language at least a little each day. When you can't be speaking with people/working on your project try reading. I brought my book of Mormon is Spanish and I recommend that. Reading helps you get a feel for how the language is used, and you can read at a pace that suites you rather than having speaking too fast to hear, much lest understand.
Watch TV. Seriously. Watch TV and movies and try as hard as you can to catch what they are saying. Write down all the words that you hear, even if you don't understand them, and look them up later. This helps a lot with listening comprehension, which has been one of the biggest problems for me as the people hear don't speak with thick gringo accents like the one's I'm used to hearing from myself and other classmates at BYU.
Take a few minutes daily to go over a grammar principle. It is helpful to review these a little each day, even just read through a bit for a few minutes. But remember that what is important is putting it into practice, so each day make a goal to use a new word or grammar principle that has been tricky for you before.
Write down things that you want to say, but can't, then find out how to say them later. This is helpful because afterwards you will know how to say something that YOU thought of, and that you will probably use again. Of course write down words you hear that you don't yet know as well.
But what I honestly think is most important (in all seriousness) is be patient with yourself. Remind yourself that you are improving more than you realize because you are hearing the language and practicing it literally ALL day. This helped me out a ton because it is only when we feel comfortable with where we are at that we are willing to speak despite our mistakes, and, as you already now, making mistakes is the best way to learn. The trouble is overcoming the fear of sounding lame, or anything else that holds us back from speaking and being ourselves.
Good luck with everything and I hope these few suggestions help. I especially recommend the last one- the biggest obstacle to our learning faster is our (sometimes unrecognized) fear to try.
Again, good luck!
Kierea! Where are you? Come back! I came back.
ReplyDelete"If I can change, you can change. We all can change."